The importance of first impressions is not to be underestimated. Appearances and speech patterns set the tone for your future dealings with others. The circumstances of the situation you’re in the first time you meet your future spouse will likely have a significant impact on whether or not she becomes your spouse. For example, were I to be seen by a woman defending myself in a bar fight, her impression of me would probably lead her to believe that I was violent and rather crazy. It’s unlikely that those are character traits that she would find appealing in a future mate. But were I to be seen by a woman giving a lot of money to a charity, it’s quite probable that she would view me favorably. It doesn’t matter that I’m the kind of guy who can do both the violent and the charitable, her impression of me will depend a great deal upon which she happens to see first.
Of course, it’s easier to ruin a person’s good impression of you than to overcome a bad impression. Unfortunate for me, because I’m great at the former and not so great at the latter.